Ancient astronauts and the ascension of Christ

8.08.2022/28.04.2024

The Ascension of Christ

from the point of view of the ancient astronauts

and the cargo cult


Question

What would a native believe if he had seen a chemically propelled spaceship take off 2,000 years ago?

I suspect he would have seen the cloud of engines and the cloud of dust whirled up by the engines and drawn his own conclusions. The spaceship and its occupants would then have travelled upwards on this cloud. At take-off, however, the spaceship would have been enveloped by its own cloud.

In Martin Luther's translation, we find the following version of Jesus' ascension.

Act 1:9 Und da er solches gesagt, ward er aufgehoben zusehends, und eine Wolke nahm ihn auf vor ihren Augen weg.

Translation in english:

Acts of the apostles

Act 1:9 And when he had spoken these things, he was taken up faster and faster, and a cloud carried him up before their eyes.

luther bibel himmelfahrt acten der apsoteln
Ascension of Christ, original version by Martin Luther.

The "zusehens" in row 9 indicates an acceleration. Martin Luther was the best Bible translator to date.

In the version of the Catholic Church, which always translates in its own way, we find the following version.

Acts of the Apostles

9 And when he had said this, he was taken up before their eyes, and a cloud received him out of their sight.
10 And as they looked up to heaven with bated breath as he ascended, behold, two men in white stood by them,
scansione di Gesù cristo, antichi astronauti
The Ascension of Christ from the perspective of pre-astronautics and the cargo cult

You just have to ask yourself: Where did Jesus go?

To heaven?

To Mexico?

Or somewhere else?

Why did the mass murderer Bishop Diego de Landa destroy all the Mayan books and murder all their clerics?

Dear reader, if the Semmelweis reflex has seized you now, I apologise.